Guilty Thoughts

Why is guilt an emotion humans have to grapple with? It seems to unfair to me when I think about all the energy I must expend in a day trying to talk myself out of the self flagellation that is my inner guilt-track.  Are women more prone to it than men? Or, are men just […] more…

That Big Allegorical Thing in the Room

My writers block is not due to having nothing to write about; but rather way too much to write about and not a clear idea as to how to describe the thoughts which are whizzing around my brain. I guess the best shot I can take is through allegory. Imagine: a beating, hot, passionate, scary […] more…

The Greeks

Ahh! Cat-lin! We were just talking about you! Which do you prefer: Michelangelo or Picasso? I don’t like Picasso, I think it is too simple, too boring. I look at it in one second and I am bored. Michelangelo! Ah! That is a master! I can look at his work for hours and am not bored!  We […] more…

Cutie Returns

What’s this? A text? at 2am? On Saturday? Who’s… Cutie? Ohhhhhhh. Jeeze, haven’t heard from that guy since October. Wonder what he has to say. WHAT THE FUCK!? Oh, Cutie. Whyyyyyyy? I’ve heard about guys sending pictures of their hard-on’s, but have never had first hand experience with it and it’s so… weird! Don’t send […] more…

Chocolate, Amen.

I sat at my kitchen window, staring out at what looked like a very pretty day and trying to find any kind of motivation to get the hell out of the apartment. I thought about running, or going to the gym. Maybe I could take a small walk around the neighborhood… It seemed like each […] more…

Sorry, Not Interested.

What? I can’t hear you over the music! My friends are over there, yeah. I’m not alone… What was that? Sorry. I need to go and pretend like I’ve got an important question my friends want me to answer. I don’t care about what whisky you’re drinking. Byeeee. One Magners please. Um, I see you […] more…

Mr. No Call No Show

We meet at a function of some sort, we hit it off (or at least, I think we hit it off), numbers are swapped, and then I go home with a smile on my face about the excitement over meeting this cool new dude.  He seems fun the more I know about him! He knows some […] more…

Modesty

I was walking back to the 42nd street subway stop from an improv show. It was midnight and I felt tired having just spent a lot of energy in my own improv rehearsal and then watching a show. I hunched into my jacket and felt the familiar sense of false safety from having a big […] more…

A New York State of Mind

I’m free for these twenty minutes on these three days this month, but you’ll have to check with me on the day of, because I always double book and I may have something more important going on than hanging with you, so I may cancel, and therefore it is important for you to double book […] more…

When I First Got Stitched Up

The first time I ever needed stitches, I was 13 and I was standing outside the door of my math class, feeling a little sorry for myself (because I sucked at Pre-Calculus). The other 8th graders were filing out of the room: some I knew, many I didn’t. I stared off into the middle distance, […] more…

The Worst Case Scenario Make-Out

I popped another pepto-bismal and chewed on the hard, pink, chalky tablets on my way to my improv show. The pink gunk stuck to my back teeth and I tried to pry it loose with my tongue as I walked down the busy sidewalk. Suddenly, the image of what I must look like as I […] more…

New Bedroom

I painted an entire room the last two days. I did it almost exclusively by myself. I had about 15 minutes of help from my sister’s friends who came to help clean the apartment, but, otherwise: the project was done by me. When I first walked in to the 11×11′ space I knew I had […] more…