Getting On With What’s Next!

I’ll be out of here, soon. I repeated to myself, over and over, as the night marched on. I felt the heaviness of being at work working its way into my shoulders, circling my neck and stepping on my chest. I felt like a sunflower being put in the closet again. The problem is not […] more…

Remember Me?

“You look familiar.” He said, his brown eyes looking at me out of their corners. He stood leaning against the half-wall that divides the Cabaret I work in. I could tell he was trying to look casual and suave, but the wrinkled collar on his teal colored polo shirt, the rigidness of running his hand […] more…

The Waiting Room

I’ve got no dental insurance and although I could use this forum as a place to rant and rave about my feelings over this country’s brain aneurisms when it comes to voting for universal health care…. I’ll spare you, dear reader, from the diatribe that I could express over my anger about getting medical bills […] more…

Red Carpe Diem

In a towel, preferably red, I’d stand in front of the foggy mirror and deliver my oscar speech. I’d thank my parents, my agent, my director, my amazing husband, my dog, my garbage man, all the people who ever disliked me because I’d made it and they hadn’t… etc. I’d wrap and unwrap the towel […] more…

Toilet Paper

I shuddered at the staggering amount of toilet paper my apartment goes through in a month. Just looking into the waste basket by the toilet one can see the bones of the toilet rolls sticking their brown turd-like heads out of the basket as I reach for another wad of Cottonelle to wipe my butt […] more…

Sick

The taste of mucus reminds me of being little. It’s such a specific taste, and I think everyone can agree it is unique. Like a turkey dinner, the nostalgia from snot makes me think of all the blissful days spent at home missing school growing up. The night before elementary school, like Tuesday, I’d be feeling […] more…

Single-Awareness Day

Thoughts on Valentine’s Day: YES! To the couple on the subway: You guys are just too damn cute. Take a bow. No really. Take a fucking bow. She’s serenading you! And she’s holding a somewhat wilted rose attached to a stem that’s 5 feet long! How romantic! I love that you included me in this! […] more…

Step A to D: A Stab at Success

In a recent conversation with my gym buddy, a “step-by-step” dating game system came into view for me. I can only write from the female perspective here, but here’s a rough idea of what I feel the levels of dating are, and once realized, I came to the conclusion that there is a recipe for […] more…

Pancakes

I poured the creamy gluten free batter onto the hot pan and watched the “silver dollar” sized pancakes fluff and bubble in the oil. Goddamn that looks so good. I thought, already reaching for the honey I was going to drench my treat in. I’d spent the better portion of my day trying to will myself […] more…

Directing

I sat listening; my chin in my cupped hands, my fingers curled, my cuticles in my mouth. I watched their movements: their choices, and listened to their voices, watched their body languages. I analyzed what they were saying to each other, the three women in front of me, and I sat in my corner with my […] more…

Thinking Like a Girl

6 Ways to Think Like a Girl!By: Me.A Comprehensive and TOTALLY TRUE look at the workings of a girl brain.  6. I look Fat. Nothing says stereotype like that statement. If you are striving to think like a girl, it is important to look at yourself in a mirror, grab a hold of your belly […] more…

The Parting Point

We walked across 5th avenue, my scarf pulled up around my cheeks as the cold, early February wind made me want to whine while it whistled through the caverns the midtown skyscrapers create. I glanced to my left and noticed we were close to the “parting point” where we say our good-bye’s and then go […] more…