Christmas Down Under

Merry Christmas, all!

New Zealand is really throwing me for a loop with all the “enjoy your summer!” signs right next to blaring posters of Santa riding a sleigh in his red wool. I keep wondering why the South Pacific doesn’t do its own version of Santa and the “North Pole” extravaganza when they are so damn far from the Northern Hemisphere tradition. Even as I write this now, I’m 16 hours ahead, so that by the time my area will be enjoying Christmas, I’ll be in Boxing Day! If I could, I would propose a cool region specific Santa, a guy wearing sunglasses, white foot-ball-tar style sun screen across his red cheeks, and knobby knees peeking out from under his red shorts. The Santa from Down Under would ride in an old beetle from 1963 and come in through the side door where he’d have to duck under the laundry that was hung up to dry in the sun. He’d get to your home in the early morning (rather than at night) and kindly place the presents under the furry furry citrus smelling trees they have down here. He’d say things like “crickey!” and “Go On!” A really nice guy, personable and friendly and very polite. You’d ask him to stay for Christmas ham and Chrissy Cake and he’d politely decline, raising his sunglasses over his white head which would be covered in almost a dread-lock of long silver hair. The sun would have tanned his skin to outline the image of the sunglasses to his face. His smile lines would run deep and there’d be a twinkle in his blue eyes as he’d tell you that he has to make his way up North and that he’s “Really, quite busy. Got a bit of work to do yet!”
A nice guy, indeed. A real Kiwi. Or Aussie. Or Pacific Islander. Or… whatever. Just, not the Kris Kringle we know him to be while battling the strong Arctic winds as he makes his way over the North Hemisphere.

December 24, 2013 at 10:51 pm by Natalie Allen