Help Desk

Hi. Can I help you?

Yeah. I’m looking for a clue.

Ok, we have a variety of those. Is there a genre you’re interested in?

Um. I was leaning toward Grad School?

Ah! School Advice. That’s a popular one. We have:
“Should I Go to School? Vol. 1-15″
“Liberal Arts Grad School and You: Advice on How to Get Poor Quick”
“Delaying Real Life For a Degree.”
“My Parents Hate That I’m an Actor”
and “I Don’t Know What Else To Do So I’m Gonna Go To School… Again.” Do any of these titles work for you?

Yes. Actually. TheĀ “I Don’t Know What Else To Do So I’m Gonna Go To School… Again.” sounds like my cup of tea.

Ok. Just be forewarned: it’s a how-to guide, not a “10 Commandments” kind of book.

Yeah, I just need a guide? I’m looking for a clue, not an answer.

Ok, great. Then I think this book will work for you. May I ask, what Graduate school program were you thinking?

An MFA in Creative Non-Fiction.

Oh, interesting! I think you’d do well with that.

You do? What gives you that impression?

You look like you have a lot on your mind. You look smart. Your family values education, and your boyfriend already has a second degree, no?

How do you know?

You also write a lot, a blog, and you read a lot, and I’ll bet you constantly say to yourself: “I could have written that better.”

…Yes. I do.

Don’t get me wrong, but I think this is a bit of a no-brainer.

Like, you’re saying I should go to grad school and get an MFA in writing? And spend 2 more years in New York City and take on debt for a seemingly innocuous degree?

You used the word “Innocuous” in that last sentence: I think that says it all. You’ve got talent that your mother says you’ve possessed since you first learned to put pencil to paper. You’ll thrive with the training.

But, this book? This’ll help me get a clue, right?

I don’t think you need a clue, Natalie.

Who are you?! How do you know this about me?

I’m just the lady behind the Help Desk counter of your sub-conscious, Natalie. I’ve always been here, and always will. You can take the book if you want, but I don’t think there’s anything in there you don’t already know.

Wow. Thanks. I’ll… Give this some real thought.

Okay! Come back if you need more advice or more clues!

Well, actually? Since I’m here… I was looking for a clue about long-term international relationships with members of the opposite sex.

Great! I have a bunch of those… looks like you could use a few.

September 24, 2013 at 6:46 pm by Natalie Allen