Single-Awareness Day

Thoughts on Valentine’s Day:

YES! To the couple on the subway: You guys are just too damn cute. Take a bow. No really. Take a fucking bow. She’s serenading you! And she’s holding a somewhat wilted rose attached to a stem that’s 5 feet long! How romantic! I love that you included me in this! …Who me? I’m on a date with my Mom and Step-Dad. They took me out for dinner, bought me chocolate and I’m now going home with them: score! I’d say that’s how to court a lady, except, clearly, “Mr. 6 foot 2, chestnut hair, green eyes and ironic leather shoes” over here is winning the evening over because the entire subway car can hear your girlfriend sing a song you both had your first kiss to. Man. I’m jealous. 

Stooooooop the world! Let’s all have a look at what’s going on across the street for a minute! Looks like he’s bending a knee… Oh! He’s popping a question! He must have picked this day as a special day. Thursdays are super special, and this one happens to be Valentines Day! I wondered if he thought of that when going through the calendar. He probably figured she would be off work tonight. Haha! Happy Thursday, everybody! It’s not Valentines Day: no! It’s the couple across the street’s special day, now!
More chocolate!? Don’t mind if I do. But wait until tomorrow: the day after Valentines Day is really for the single ladies who can buy all that chocolate for half off. I’ll call it: CheapChocolateThatsGoingInMyMouthAllDay Day. 
I think it’s 11 days now since…. And about 10 months since my last boyfriend, pshht, who’s counting though? Don’t worry all you happy couples out there! I get a lot of hugs. 
Snot’s rolling down my nose. I’m gonna lick it away and then I want to kiss you!
I think I’ll buy myself some flowers, take a photo of myself with them, and then post that on facebook. 

February 15, 2013 at 7:19 am by Natalie Allen